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I was angry at alcohol, I was angry at how out of control it made me, I was angry that it was okay killing me- like, alcohol didn’t care if I died. Alcohol will always win if you aren’t prepared. If you don’t protect yourself- don’t expect other people to protect you, it’s not their responsibility- it’s yours. It’s your place to make sure you are comfortable, it’s your place to decline invitations to places or events that may not be the best spot for you.
Recovery isn’t easy, it takes patience, strength, and faith, but good things do come of it. I started therapy again and I saw my psychiatrist, who changed up my antidepressants. I worked on the guilt I felt about being a mother without my child in my life and tried to resolve myself to the possibility that we might never reconcile. Just as I began to climb out of the pit of my depression, it was May again. Should I send another birthday card? Should I leave the whole situation to God and my prayers? Again, I struggled with what is usually an easy decision.
My First Sober Christmas! (Thank God It’s Over)
At the time, I was a few months sober. He laughed and said “Yeah, right! ” to my admitting I had given up alcohol for good. When something upsets us or angers us, we have to learn healthy ways to overcome and move past it.
So, you have spent the last month getting a fresh start at the rehab center. You’re cautiously optimistic and ready to get on with your new sober life. In fact, https://ecosoberhouse.com/ deep down you know they will come hot and heavy the first week. Thank you to all of my family and friends that have stuck by me and helped me stay sober.
How Long Does LSD Stay in Your System?
I seek happiness and pleasure just like anyone else. I’ve combined quantitative strategies for rewarding myself , with qualitative strategies , to make the best out of sobriety. As you read through the site you’ll discover that I’m NOT anti-alcohol, I am NOT anti-AA. I am NOT aniti-religion. I do not follow or believe in any religion but that doesn’t mean I’m an atheist. I voice my opinions openly and honestly. I hope that my style arouses emotions within YOU and gets YOU to do some thinking on your own and come to your own conclusions. Get rid of your old life drinking crap and start creating an environment to support your new alcohol-free life.
- I think that paying attention to progression is huge in recovery.
- When I’m under high levels of stress, my mind still craves numbing.
- I’m so glad that we went to that meeting last week, and that the discussion was about the first step and rigorous honesty.
- Also, beer helped me to socialize in groups when it turns out I didn’t actually really enjoy that.
Life after addiction isn’t all rainbows, butterflies, and puppies, but it is pretty good if you keep doing the work to maintain your sobriety. The people in our lives have a limited threshold for bad behavior, even when we’re truly sorry. Eventually, people don’t want to hear our apologies anymore.
Navigating Cancer in Early Addiction Recovery
I was tired of being a piece of shit. Not feeling like a POS, but being a POS. Because my actions and my choices on a daily basis were those of a shitty person. I had no money, no coach, no motivation- I couldn’t even get off the couch for several days. All I knew, like so many people, was AA. What would I do if I was starting sobriety from day one and desperately needed to feel better fast. First of all, had it been five years ago, chances are good that I would’ve been drunk at the time.
That’s what I needed in the beginning- I needed a tribe that was centered on sobriety, because sobriety was my ONLY priority. One of the things that is talked about a lot in the rooms of recovery is that we need to strive for progress, not perfection. It’s not about becoming the perfect ideal of sobriety sucks ourselves that should be our goal, instead, it’s just that we continue to get better over time. We look for progress in the areas of our choosing and we celebrate our personal growth. It isn’t just while getting sober that rigorous honesty is important, it’s important in staying sober as well.
Not Getting A Support Network
They nervously wonder if they have a problem. Or, usually with a drink in hand, are inspired to tell me all the reasons why they can drink. Or there are those who always seem to “forget” I’ve quit and continue to offer me drinks whenever I see them. They act surprised when I remind them as if they are perpetually waiting for me to pop out of whatever phase I’m in. I’ve heard in AA circles about the “pink cloud,” a phenomenon particular to early sobriety that is marked by early euphoria and elation at being free from booze. One night in my writing group, I write about the pink cloud and my recent fall from it. After I read it aloud and wait for critique, one of the women says perhaps the cloud was protecting me until I was ready to do the work.
- I still have tons of fun with my family at holiday dinners, and nobody acts weird (or even cares really!) that I’m not drinking my face off with them.
- Perhaps not remembering what you did, waking up in jail or another strange place, or finding your well-being compromised.
- Some may argue that needing to escape is not truly living a life sobriety.
- I could go on, but I think I’ve made my point.
- This is not to say that it isn’t worth doing.
- Chelsey Flood is the author of Infinite Sky and Nightwanderers, and a lecturer in creative writing at Falmouth University.
The Serenity Prayer tells us we need to “accept the things we cannot change,” and we do need to do that – for our sanity, peace of mind, and emotional sobriety. It was the beginning of about a year of pretty significant depression.
But don’t be discouraged by my words, life can improve and it can be better than you ever imagined. But YOU have to be an active participant in your sobriety. All I can do is hope that in some way, the sharing of my experiences will help and someone else’s life will be better than they ever imagined. It was not the organization of AA authorizing this type of treatment, it was the people attending who were saying this to me and to others. The philosophy behind AA is altruistic. I’m touching on this subject because I have been asked this question by quite a few people. Please allow me to expand on these answers.
She writes about freedom, addiction, nature and love, and is working on a non-fiction book about getting sober, and a new YA novel. If you need help to soothe your feelings, you’re not alone. At first, the worst thing about being long-term sober was the sameiness of my consciousness. I was so worried and anxious all the time. Afraid of making mistakes and of what people thought of me.